When a Mate Is Unfaithful

When a Mate Is Unfaithful

INFIDELITY—
Its Tragic Consequences
"I've left," said the voice on the telephone—likely the most devastating words Pat's* husband had ever said to her. "I just couldn't believe the betrayal," she says. "What I'd always feared most—that my husband would leave me for someone else—became an awful reality."

PAT, a 33-year-old, really wanted to make the marriage work; her husband had assured her that he would never leave her. "We promised to stand by each other, come what may," Pat recalls. "I was convinced that he meant it. Then . . . he did that. Now I've got nothing—not a cat or a goldfish—nothing!"

Hiroshi will never forget the day his mother's extramarital affair came to light. "I was just 11 years old," he recalls. "Mom came storming through the house. Dad was right behind her, saying, 'Just hang on. Let's talk about this.' I could sense that something had gone horribly wrong. Dad was shattered. He's never quite recovered. What's more, he had no one to confide in. So he turned to me. Imagine it: a man in his 40's coming to his 11-year-old son for consolation and empathy!"

Whether it is the scandalous affairs that have rocked royalty, politicians, film stars, and religious leaders or the betrayal and tears in our own families, marital unfaithfulness continues to take a tragic toll. "Adultery," states The New Encyclopædia Britannica, "seems to be as universal and, in some instances, as common as marriage." Some researchers estimate that between 50 and 75 percent of people have at some time been unfaithful. Marriage researcher Zelda West-Meads says that although much infidelity goes undetected, "all the evidence points to affairs being on the increase."